From the get-go this pregnancy was quite different to my first. I was nauseous/sick the entire pregnancy. While I had sciatica when pregnant with my daughter, it was nothing in comparison to my pregnancy with Alfie.

It was so bad that on numerous occasions, whether it was after playing with my daughter, or more specific, after wrapping Christmas present, I was unable to get off the floor. If I was home alone it often resulted in me spending upwards of 20 minutes on the floor trying to stretch it out or manoeuvre  myself to use a piece of furniture to help me get up. Thinking about it now, it sounds so silly and hard to understand why I didn’t just stand up, but genuinely in the moment I was unable to get up.

Despite my morning (all day) sickness, extreme sciatica, increased carpel tunnel symptoms which rendered my hand and fingers completely numb for most of my pregnancy- to the point where I was unable to hold a shopping basket in my right hand because of lack of feeling- everything up to 20 weeks was ‘normal’.

At my 20 week scan bub started to measure 3 days behind. Again, this was in the ‘normal’ range. As my check ins with the midwives continued, the usual belly measure showed that bub wasn’t growing how he should be. Previously 3 days behind it had then become 5 days behind and then a week behind. Despite a little bit of concern on my end, I was told it was still normal. At my 34 week appointment bub measured 3 weeks behind. While the midwife was wonderfully calm when sharing this news with Erich and I, we could see she was concerned. She asked me to get a growth and wellbeing scan as soon as possible, which was 3 days later. Before getting that scan done, the hospital saw the growth numbers from my midwife appointment and asked me to come in for some monitoring. Quite unexpectantly, I left work and sat in the hospital to be monitored. I was discharged at 10pm. When we got home I received a phone call saying I shouldn’t have been discharged because towards the end of the monitoring bubs heart rate dipped. Because it was late, they said I didn’t need to come back in that moment, but to come back first thing in the morning for additional monitoring. Bub was okay, and I was discharged again. 

I had the scan through an external practitioner, rather than through the hospital as I could get in sooner. The summary of the report showed bub was smaller but doing okay. I was at this point 35 weeks pregnant and bub was measuring 32 weeks in size. I was told because bub was small, the hospital would probably want him out at 36 weeks. 

The hospital received the report and called me in for an ultrasound with them because the report had some contradictions. 

After the second health and wellbeing scan in 5 days, the hospital was happy with how bub was looking. Yes he was small, but there didn’t seem to be any concerns. I was asked to come back in a weeks time for another ultrasound. In that week I was asked to go back to the hospital 2 more times for monitoring. Bub was doing well. I would then be 37 +4. Back to the hospital for 3rd growth and wellbeing check and this time the mood in the air was different. The sonographer wasn’t as chatty. We could see on the screen that bubs measurements were once again decreasing. The sonographers responses were brief and we were often met with something along the lines of, ‘the doctor will need to discuss that with you’.

She asked what we had been told and what the current plan was. I explained we had another appointment with the Maternity Assessment Unit (MAU) the following morning.She said she needed to speak with the doctor on the ward and would be back shortly.

Nervously waiting, Erich and I held hands and tried to piece together what might be wrong or what might happen next. As we had an appointment with MAU the next morning, the doctor was fine with us going home. We were told to bring our things because bub would most likely need to come out. 

Next morning we were back for more monitoring. The doctors came in and said we needed to induce. A few room changes later, the balloon induction had started my contractions and my waters broke. But shortly after, they stopped. It was time for the oxytocin drip. Having had that with my daughter, I knew how hard and fast the contractions come on. I knew from the start of this pregnancy, that I would be having the epidural as soon as possible. With Peggy, I thought I would be able to give birth with only gas. Boy was I wrong! 

They told me I could have the epidural before the drip was put in. Best. news. ever. 

At this point a midwife needs to be with you at all times, and I am truly grateful for the midwife we had. 

Since being admitted each doctor that spoke with us warned us about the high possibility of an emergency caesarean. Something we didn’t want. 

Contractions were happening frequently. Despite my waters breaking, bubs position meant the fluid wasn’t draining and they had to break my waters. Bubs heart rate was frequently dipping. Each time it happened, we would adjust my body’s position and bub’s heart rate would stabilise. 

Our midwife had even said, at any moment a doctor will probably come in and tell us we needed an emergency c because of the dips in bubs heart beat. Sure enough, 5 minutes later there was a knock on the door. The midwife explained that she was keeping an eye on it and that when I changed positions (by this point it was a rotation of movement every 5-10 minutes from my right ride, to my back and then to my left) bub would be happy again. We were beyond grateful the midwife was able to stand up for what we wanted, or more importantly what we didn’t want. 

We had been in the hospital for a while at this point and it seemed things were going to be a while. Erich was going to duck home to check on our dogs and grab something for us to eat. As he was about to walk out the door, everything changed. It was time. The midwife asked me to push in the next contraction to start the process. She called the baby doctors. Because Bub was measuring little they seemed almost certain he would need time in NICU, or some additional support after birth. Before the baby doctors arrived, another midwife came to support. 

The midwives started to move much quicker. Getting everything sorted. Erich announced that he believed Alfie’s head was starting to come out. One of the midwives said it’s unlikely as I had only done a few pushes. A quick check from her and she confirmed Erich suspicion. She asked me to stop pushing. The baby doctors weren’t there. The next contraction came and Alfie was born. My body had pushed him out. He was tiny. I, like with my daughter, instantly burst into tears. He was so little. In fact, from that moment, every person who had come into contact with Alfie has commented on how little he is. He’s currently 7 weeks old and strangers will often ask or presume he’s only days or a week old. 

Alfie was born 2.2kgs. ‘Little but mighty’ one of the midwives had said when he began to wriggle up my chest. Thankfully he didn’t need to go to NICU and due to my stash of colostrum (100-ish mls), the fact that my milk came in the moment he was born, and because his vitals were all well, we were both discharged within 24 hours. 

Tests of the placenta showed that there were several issues with it, and that we had done the right thing with the induction because each issue could have caused a different end result.

Alfie’s continued to live up to the words ‘little but mighty’ and at 7 weeks is weighing 3.8kgs. 

What do you wish you knew before birth?

Before my first birth I wish I knew just how much say I have in everything. You’re told that you need to stand up for what you want and vocalise if you’re not comfortable with anything or if you feel like you’re not being heard, but understandably in that moment you’re experiencing something you’ve never experienced before and so you trust (sometimes too much) the people who do it everyday. 

I remembered this with my second birth and believe it (and the midwife) are the reason Alfie wasn’t born via caesarean. 

If you could, would you do anything differently?

I’m pretty content with my second birth, and learnt a lot from my first. 

What did your partner do that really helped during labour/birth?

Erich consistently told me, in one way or another, that I was doing a good job. It was especially helpful when the contractions were happening after the balloon was put in place. Not only was he offering supportive words, but physical support and suggestions of differing positions to ease the pressure/ pain. The constant offering of food and water, holding my hand for each needle or examination and each kiss on my forehead did not go unnoticed or unappreciated. Thank you again, Erich. I love you. 

What advice/honest truth would give a mama-to-be about birth?

There is a gap in between contractions. That’s something I obviously knew. However I didn’t think about it in reality. With my first birth my contractions were 5-7 minutes apart. Honest truth- there is a high possibility that bubs head may be out for a number of minutes before the rest of their body follows. And because I had the epidural, it was quite calm between contractions. I was having a conversation with my husband, mum and midwives for several minutes while waiting for the next contraction to push my daughter’s body out. That is a weird feeling! 

Lastly, take things to do in hospital before the birth. Everything takes a long time. We took our iPad to watch things on, the Nintendo switch to play Mario Karts and Super Smash Brothers. We also played UNO.