When Steff Met Summer
Steff is a big believer in sharing the positives of birth, that it’s a time of feeling incredibly vulnerable, yet so strong and empowered…and she does just sharing the birth her third child, Summer.
Steff talks through her induction, how she worked through the pain of her contractions mentally, and how she needed to call and pay a deposit for curtains during labour before the quote expired!
Steff tells her birth story in her own words…
My third pregnancy was by far the hardest on my body. I was sick for the longest I have ever been, I was exhausted needing iron infusions, and I was literally so huge, I would ride a scooter up and down our ridiculously long hallway. I had been early with both my boys. Madden came spontaneously at 39 weeks and Reggie was induced at 38+3 after I had a bleed. Knowing this, my OB looked at me at my 37-week appointment and said "get everything done in the next two weeks, you're not going to make it to 40 again".
Those two weeks came and went and so did another two! I was finally booked for an induction after two stretch and sweeps failed to get things moving. My OB booked me for ripening (the most foul word in the birthing dictionary) on the Tuesday for an induction on the Wednesday. My mum travelled down from Sydney to be with our boys while Josh and I met our latest surprise. I'd been very diplomatic the entire pregnancy saying I didn't care if it was a boy or girl. I'm one of three girls, so I knew what a great friendship and bond three boys would have, but you can bet I secretly touched 11:11 every day wishing for my girl.
Tuesday came and I took myself into hospital for ripening and Josh was going to show my mum where to drop and pick our son up from school and meet me there afterwards. I was examined by my midwife Fiona (love her! Still obsessed with her!) and the OB on that day. I was borderline ready to go, so on advice from the top OB, they were going to do the induction that day as I was already 3cm dilated. The process started with breaking my water. Fiona was a student midwife and had a go at doing it, once with the hook and once with what she lovingly called the "finger condom" but couldn't quite get it. The midwife who delivered Madden 6 years earlier (who was also a student at that time) came in and broke them. Like the boys before, I had so much fluid! Lying in a giant pad of warm liquid is one of the worst feelings! I couldn't imagine that happening at home in bed.
Fiona put me in a super flattering adult nappy and told me to go for a walk for about half an hour to get bub moving down. Josh went to get us some lunch at this time and I walked the block. I walked back past the first house we built together and the route we'd walk our dogs each night. I was so excited, I passed a lady waiting for a bus and just wanted to lean over and whisper "I'm in labour!". I didn't because how embarrassing. I walked back up the hill and met Josh in the carpark where we collected our bags. As we walked towards the hospital doors, the cutest little old man was driving out, looked at our bags and my belly and gave the sweetest smile of "how exciting for you".
When we returned to the birthing suite, Fiona had made the room dark, with soft blue lights and an oil diffuser going. It was beautiful. I hopped up on the bed and she started the induction medication. I ate my lunch and had to do one quick job. I needed to call and pay a deposit for curtains for our house as the quote expired in two days. I knew I'd never get it done with a newborn the following day. I rang and the lady asked " have you had that baby yet" to which I told her I was actually being induced as we spoke. "Like having contractions?" she asked. "Yeah, little ones" I replied. She jokingly asked to stay on the phone. Last job done and dusted, this was around 11:45am.
I messaged all my sisters in our group chat saying that bub was coming today, they'd be aunties again by tonight and I better go because it's starting to get painful. Birth for me has always been just as much a mental experience and a physical one. If I don't stay on top of myself and the pain mentally, it's hard to get back in control. I chose to lay on my left side and take each building contraction at a time, breathing deeply, telling myself to "calm down, calm down, calm down". I'm very self-conscious of making noise during birth for some dumb reason (don't be) so just close my eyes and grit my teeth through each contraction. Fiona asked us to guess what time we thought bub would come. Josh guessed 1:30pm...an hour away! My second birth I was induced at 9am and he didn't come till 3:46pm so I was preparing for an all-day slog.
When things really started amping up, I was offered a shower or gas. I hate the gas and refused both. I contemplated an epi. Things were so intense, and it had only been an hour. Based on prior experience, I thought I still had hours to go and this was full on so quickly, when all of a sudden, I got the shakes. I know when I get the shakes, it's go time. My body gave one involuntary push and I said to Josh "I have to push". No one was in the room with us at that stage. He had a firm grasp of my hand and called out to Fiona. She came running and checked me. I could tell in her eyes, it was too late for any pain relief and bub was right there. She gave me a look and asked how I wanted to do this. I chose to stay on my side as there was no pressure on my back. I started pushing with each contraction, all while telling myself it was ok and keep calm. It felt like bub's head just crowned forever. Finally, it came and with one more push and big bopper was placed on my chest at 1:04pm. Barely an hour and a half. Fiona let out a "woah! that'll be 4 kilos for sure!".
After a moment to process it all, she invited Josh around to tell me what we'd had. I held my breath as I heard Josh kind of apprehensively say "it's a little girl" followed by "I think?". I definitely repeated "Are you sure!" five or six times. “Can someone qualified please check”. I cried and laughed and cried and laughed some more. It was the most euphoric moment that still brings tears to my eyes today. 4.2 kilos of delicious baby girl. Our Summi angel. Her utterly adoring brothers came to meet her within the hour and are just as smitten by her today, as they were in that moment.
Can I do it all again now?
What do you wish you knew before birth?
I wish I had known that it would probably be my last. I would do it all again in a heartbeat.
If you could, would you do anything differently?
I honestly don't think I would change a thing. I was incredibly lucky to have such a straight-forward, easy birth. I'd maybe get a birth photographer again actually. I had one with my second birth and nothing beats those photos. Mel Hill Photography are your girls!
What did your partner do that really helped during labour/birth?
Josh has been the most incredible birth partner each time we've brought a baby into the world. He will tell you himself, he finds the hospital part the most exciting. He's been the biggest supporter of not finding out the gender with any of our babies and sharing that moment with him, my favourite person, is something I'll always treasure. It's kind of unique to him but Josh just being Josh was the best help during labour. He comforts, supports and advocates for me (all that mushy stuff) but he's also the guy who talks to anyone, makes light of a situation and makes the room laugh. He's great. I’m very lucky.
What advice/honest truth would give a mama-to-be about birth?
It's honestly the best thing you will ever do. I'm a big believer of sharing the positives of birth. It's a time when I've simultaneously felt so incredibly vulnerable, yet so strong and empowered. I would say to be proud of your body and what it is about to do. Trust your body and trust your instincts. Everyone there, is there to get the best outcome for you and your baby so lean on whatever or whoever feels right at the moment but don't forget to marvel in the process and obviously gorgeous little outcome.