When Lauren Met Nadia

Lauren, from the cbrmamas team, gave birth to her daughter Nadia just four weeks ago.

She unexpectedly had a very fast labour for her first, and she shares how she felt confused and upset with the speed of it all. She went from her waters breaking to having Nadia in her arms within three hours!

As there was no time for drugs, she used a comb as a pain management tool.

Lauren tells her birth story in her own words…

I’ll begin by saying I tried EVERY SINGLE thing to try and get myself to go into spontaneous labour - acupuncture, spicy food, long walks, bouncing on my gym ball all day, raspberry leaf tea... you name it, I tried it. While some of these things may have helped me move along, none of them kick started things for me so I opted to have a stretch and sweep in my 40th week because I was more than ready to meet this baby!

I had the stretch and sweep done on Thursday and after two days of no movement I arrived at my due date on the Saturday. It took all of my energy but I had let go of the fact I’d go into labour on time and settled in for the night with dinner and Netflix and was trying to enjoy this time as much as I could. I went to bed at midnight and after lying there awake for about 20 minutes I felt this weird pop... I threw the blankets off, looked down and realised my waters had just broken. I was told your waters can break in two ways - a slow trickle, or the “Hollywood gush”. Let me tell you, mine could have been a new category: Niagara Falls.

This was at about 12:30am and after jumping out of bed and cleaning myself up I called my midwife and let her know, but I didn’t have any contractions at that point so she advised me to try get as much rest as I could overnight and if there was no movement we’d check back in again in the morning.

So there’s me thinking time is on my side, I was finishing packing my bag and I jumped in the shower. Then the contractions started. They were slow and manageable and I was finding it helpful being in the shower and continuing to move around through each contraction. I had done a prenatal yoga class through pregnancy and a lot of the breathing techniques we were taught were also really helpful to get me through each contraction. But after about 15 minutes, none of these things were working anymore. The pain of each contraction really ramped up to a point where I was thinking sh*t, if this is early labour I want out!

My contractions were coming at me so hard and fast I could hardly speak to my husband Aidan, so I grabbed my tens machine and put it on and I’m pretty sure I immediately put it on the highest setting. Aidan started timing my contractions and they were coming in at 40 seconds apart, lasting for a minute at least. We started to panic and both of us were in disbelief they were honestly this close together... it hadn’t even been an hour! Aidan called my midwife back and we made the decision to meet at the hospital to see what was going on. If we had made the decision to get my midwife over to our house to check me instead, I have no doubt we would have ended up having an accidental home birth.

It was about 1:45am when we got in the car and headed to the hospital, and that car ride was the LONGEST car ride of my life. I do live about 15 minutes from the hospital but it honestly felt like eternity. I couldn’t speak and I don’t even think I could open my eyes at that point. There was some road closed signs around the back of the hospital at the maternity entrance and we mistook that thinking that entrance was closed so pulled up at the emergency entrance. I want to take this opportunity to apologise to anyone who may have been there and saw the state I was in at that point! I clearly remember walking through the doors, throwing up in my hand while more of my waters and probably other bodily fluids exploded out me onto the floor of the entrance.

By the time I eventually made it up to the birth suites I saw my midwife there waiting at my room and the first thing I said to her was I NEED AN EPIDURAL NOW. By that point I was already 6cm+ dilated and it was moving very fast. Too late for the epidural. I remember at this point feeling confused and upset because I felt so out of control and I was scared about how quickly this was happening. I was expecting this process to be longer, especially being my first birth, so this was not a scenario I’d ever pictured.

My midwife had started running the bath for me and within about 20 minutes I was in the water. I never had a specific birth plan and was happy to go with the flow but I knew I wanted to use the bath as my “big gun” when it came to managing the pain. I’m so thankful for the environment my midwives created for me, the lights were dimmed, everyone was calm and it felt really intimate. They helped me into the water and as soon as I was in there I felt more relaxed and my body felt weightless.

Another thing I’d learnt about during pregnancy was the use of combs as a pain management tool during birth - like actual hair combs that you brush your hair with. If you haven’t heard about them, you squeeze them when you have a contraction to try redirect your focus on a different pain point during the peak of a contraction. A friend of mine had given me a pair of combs to use and that ended up being the only thing I had to get me through each contraction. So there’s me in the water squeezing my hair combs and ready to push... A very different place to being in my bed watching Netflix just a couple of hours earlier!

I really had no idea just how close I was to meeting my baby at this point. My body just took over and I pushed for about 30 minutes and at 3:21am (now that I think about it that time sounds like a countdown) I lifted our baby girl out of the water and put her on my chest. It was such a surreal moment, I couldn’t really comprehend that I was now holding our baby!

What do you wish you knew before birth?

That birth is completely unpredictable, and unpredictable includes things happening really fast. I wish I had listened to my body and the signs better at the beginning of my labour rather than writing them off and doubting myself because I just had in my head that your first birth typically takes longer. I wasn’t prepared for things to move fast and I think that’s why it was so hard for me to mentally catch up during labour and feel like I was in control and not freak out.

If you could, would you do anything differently?

My overall birth experience was positive, and I am proud of what I was able to do even though the entire time I was telling myself I couldn’t do it! But if I was to go back again, I would have put more effort into preparing myself for what happens once you take your baby home. While we had help at the hospital on the basics, my brain just could not retain any information because I hadn’t slept and was also processing the birth. That first night home and the first few days were so overwhelming so I wish we’d focussed on learning some of the basics beforehand like even how to swaddle properly, feeding and sleeping.

What did your partner do that really helped during labour/birth?

I really needed a calm and reassuring voice throughout the labour because I was feeling the opposite of calm. Even though there were moments of panic (like when we realised we needed to get to the hospital like 1 hour ago) Aidan was still able to talk me through what was happening, make me feel like everything was going to be OK and give me the encouragement I needed.

What advice/honest truth would give a mama-to-be about birth?

That it’s ok to not feel a strong connection to your baby immediately, but it will come. It was such a surreal and out of body experience for me to pull her out and hold her for the first time and I am so grateful for that experience. But I also felt like I was in genuine shock and so exhausted that I found it hard to feel anything in that first 24 hours after birth.