Nicole Parker

Tell us a bit about yourself?

I’m Nicole, and I’ve lived in Blayney and Tura beach and now living in Canberra. I’m a mum of two, a wife to one and a teacher (to a fair few). I’ve tried to adopt many hobbies but yet to find one that sticks. So I listen to podcasts and watch Netflix in my down time. The pod I listen to on the reg is @emsolation

What were you doing before babies?

I am a primary school teacher. I was teaching year one and two at a public school and between babies teaching preschool. I absolutely adored teaching preschool after becoming a mum. Preschool is all about building relationships and I knew I would be on the right track if I was exactly the person I was hoping I was leaving my baby with.

How did you come to be a mum?

We were lucky enough to be one of the first in our friendship group to get married and then have a baby. This seemed like fun at the time, but has presented its fair share of problems with toddlerhood, as our son has no kids to play with his own age. When all our friends had their kids, I remember watching with jealousy as they sat together with their little babies as I was missing the adult conversation and support I had craved since becoming a mum chasing my toddler around. We are extremely grateful to have been able to fall pregnant naturally twice. My first pregnancy, with my son, was very text book. The morning sickness passed after the first trimester and I was able to only take time off work for appointments rather than for being ill. My water broke on it’s own the day before he was due. I was induced but because of fetal distress was taken for an emergency C-section after 13 hours of labour. My second pregnancy with my daughter was so different. I had morning sickness the entire time! I originally planned and prepared for a VBAC but I had placenta previa and had a planned c-section.

What has your feeding journey been like?

Unfortunately after having my son, I had a Subcutaneous Hematoma and a staph infection. This caused my body to not produce any milk - understandably as it was trying to keep me alive! With my daughter I sought the help of a lactation consultant early as it was something I really wanted to do second time around. It was so lucky I did as they found a tongue tie at two weeks old! After having it cut and building my supply back up we are happily feeding now at four months old.

What has sleep been like in your house?

What is that? Just recently my two and a half year old has been diagnosed with obstructive sleep apnoea which explains his frequent wakings all his life. At six months old we visited Tressillion with him for some sleep support as well. I found that really helpful, and my nurse Ruth was so wonderful, I could text her any time if I needed a tip or some support.

The hardest bits…

Lack of sleep. I think having no sleep makes everything else you would normally cope with all the more excruciating. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. You really need to cut yourself some slack there - if you can find a good chunk of sleep you need to take it, even if that means giving up a feed to your support person if you are fortunate enough to have one.

The best bits…

It’s hard to choose the best bits as I reflect because it is such an amazing experience. Being out the other side of PND you can see the value in it all - good and bad. I think having done the hypnobirthing course with Eloise and Nicole was really wonderful too! @positivebirthcanberra helped me really understand my first birth as well as prepare for the second.

How do you make time for you?

I’m so much better at this the second time around! I think trusting that the other adults in your kids’ lives are more than capable, and accepting they will do it their own way really helps to carve out some time.

What’s next for you and your family? Having our second baby during lockdown meant hardly any of our family have met her. So making sure we get to see every one now is our top priority. That and the Christmas lights!

A piece of advice for our readers?

Don’t accept advice from strangers I guess if you can remember that no one on the Earth is you and never before has your baby been born and there has never been your specific combination before, that helps to back yourself and that if it works for you - it works

And let’s put the phrase “making a rod for your back” in the bin! I hate that!