Kahri
Tell us a bit about yourself?
I’m 31, about to get married to my fiancé (covid willing ). We’ve been together for 7 years and engaged for 4, finally getting married! I am studying a Master of Teaching in Early Childhood and Primary Education and have dreams of being a preschool teacher.
What were you doing before babies?
Before babies I was working in the public service doing shift work and loving it. I was studying my Bachelor of Medical Science (which I have unfortunately never ended up using even though I’m still very passionate about medicine and medical science) and I was training to run a half marathon. I ran my first half marathon just before I realised I was pregnant with my first bub.
How did you come to be a mum?
I’ve always wanted to be a mum. I love kids and have always loved kids. We were incredibly lucky to have no problems falling pregnant but my first pregnancy was honestly horrendous. I had Hyperemesis Gravidarum and was throwing up every 15 minutes like clockwork for weeks and weeks and weeks. I remember lying in bed with a bucket at around 9 weeks pregnant wondering how other people did this ‘morning sickness’ because I could barely function. I had no idea that what I was experiencing was not morning sickness. At 10 weeks I tried to have a shower and couldn’t stand up and couldn’t even lift my arms to my head to wash my hair because I was so weak and sick and I realised something was very wrong and this couldn’t be normal. I drove myself to hospital - puking into a sick bag as I drove! Where they admitted me into the short stay unit and ran a bunch of tests and diagnosed me with Hyperemesis Gravidarum. I had never heard of it before except that it was the sickness that ‘the princess had’. I was put on many many anti-nausea medications which I had to take multiple times a day right until my baby was born. I was admitted to hospital for IV fluids many times through that pregnancy. If I missed so much as one tablet I was back to puking every 15 minutes. I couldn’t work for 6 months of my pregnancy. It was horrible. But my baby was born 1 week past her due date, happy and healthy and she has thrived ever since!
I was told that I had a 98% chance of experiencing this with every pregnancy so perhaps I was mad when we decided to try for baby number 2 when our eldest was 10 months old… I was incredibly lucky and I only experienced normal morning sickness for baby 2. Which was still yuck! But no where near as bad as Hyperemesis Gravidarum.
What has your feeding journey been like?
I’ve been incredibly lucky and have never once had a problem with breastfeeding. I’ve never had mastitis or anything! However, my period has returned 5 weeks after each of my kids were born despite exclusively breastfeeding. With my second bub, this made my milk supply drop sharply around my period every month so for a while I needed to supplement with some formula at times through that week. I breastfed my eldest until she was around 17 months and am still occasionally breastfeeding my 18 month old youngest. We have been very blessed!
What has sleep been like in your house?
What is sleep? my eldest has never been a great sleeper, she’s good now that she’s 3 but she sleeps with us for most of the night (which I actually love). My youngest was our miracle sleeper - we could put her down awake since birth and she would happily put herself to sleep. She still does this. However the past month or so I became lazy and took her into our spare bed once she woke at night and we are still to this day spending the rest of the night co-sleeping in our spare bed. I actually love this as well, but it means my fiancé has no hope of being able to settle her through the night because all she wants is me. That is exhausting. I am against sleep training though and I know when they’re grown I will miss all of the snuggles so I’m enjoying it while I can!
The hardest bits…
The sleep deprivation is by far the hardest for me. It hit me very hard with my eldest. I am a person who is asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow and don’t wake at all through the night until my alarm goes off in the morning. It actually blew my mind to realise most adults wake to go to the toilet or get a drink or something through the night because I never, ever do. So being woken many many many times a night was a big shock to my sleepy system!
I have also struggled with Post-Partum depression which has taken a big toll on me and all of my family but I’m working hard to improve this!
The best bits…
The unconditional love from my babies. They are absolutely the lights of my life, I adore them so much. I adore watching them learn, play, experience things. It is the best part of my life!
How do you make time for yourself?
I love craft. I keep a bullet journal and try to spend 5-15 mins every night doing that. I also enjoy cross stitch, diamond painting, drawing and crochet. Whenever I get a chance I do one of those things too. I also love reading and have become a huge fan of audiobooks as it allows me to read while doing household chores.
What’s next for you and your family?
We are in the age-old debate of ‘do we have a third child or do we enjoy the sleep we are now starting to get’ but otherwise I am looking at finishing my teaching degree and changing careers. My eldest is due to start preschool next year which is very scary for me but very exciting for her.
If you could talk to your pre baby/kid self, what advice would you give?
Don’t stress the small stuff. It doesn’t matter if you ‘give in’ and co-sleep. It doesn’t matter if your schedule isn’t the same as anyone else’s, stop comparing yourself to others. If it’s working for you and your family then it’s perfect!