Tell us a bit about yourself?

I’m 27 and mum to Lucy, who is 12 months old.

What were you doing before babies?

Travelling (remember that?) and working full time in marketing and communication.

How did you come to be a mum?

It probably came as a surprise to no one when we announced our pregnancy, my husband and I were both keen to start our family. But despite that and being relatively young when trying to conceive, it was actually a frustrating and time consuming process. Halfway through my pregnancy I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s disease, an autoimmune disease that affects your thyroid and among other things can cause infertility. That explained why we struggled to conceive, and was also scary because uncontrolled Hashimoto’s during pregnancy increases the risk of a whole bunch of issues for both the pregnancy and baby. I was immediately put on medication which stabilised my hormone levels and now know it’s something I’ll need to have under control before we try for another baby. Aside from the Hashimoto’s and some horrendous sickness (thank you modern medicine for ondansetron) my pregnancy was healthy and Lucy was born on her due date. The birth itself was a bit of an ordeal, I “pre-laboured” for 24 hours with almost no progress because Lucy was posterior. Finally my water broke and I was given an epidural with oxytocin to speed things up, but Lucy went into fetal distress and needed to be born immediately. She was delivered via Kiwi-cup and episiotomy. She was unresponsive immediately after being born but after some time on CPAP fortunately she perked up and avoided a NICU stay. The trauma from birth resulted in jaundice for Lucy which meant a longer hospital stay than I would have liked with no visitors due to Covid.

What has your feeding journey been like?

I breastfeed Lucy and the first 6 weeks (at least) were painful and challenging. Because of her jaundice Lucy was too tired to latch for the first 24 hours, which meant feeding her expressed colostrum with our fingers while I expressed more to ensure my milk would come in. When she was strong enough to breastfeed she wouldn’t latch correctly. The midwives diagnosed her with a tongue tie and had a specialist come to see us on the day we were discharged from hospital. He took one look at her and said she doesn’t have a tongue tie, which was both a huge relief but also super frustrating (because why won’t she latch then?). He watched her feed and gave me some great tips for helping her latch. Eventually she and I got the hang of it but while we both learnt what we were doing I was dealing with cracked nipples, mastitis and a baby who started to lose weight rather than gain it. It was incredibly stressful but I’m so thankful we got through it because I have absolutely loved breastfeeding her since.

What has sleep been like in your house?

Because of her weight loss as a newborn we were told to wake her for feeds which was hard for all of us. How do you wake up a newborn baby who immediately falls asleep at the breast? We tried everything! She just wanted to sleep. At some point during the four month regression I was so tired I brought her into our bed to feed her and she’s mostly stayed there ever since. I chose to stop fighting her short naps and night wakes and just accept that babies can be wakeful. It’s been a huge weight off my shoulders and I wish I had done it sooner.

The hardest bits…

I spent way too long stressing about things that are NORMAL for babies, particularly feeding in the early days and later on sleep. In hindsight it just fills me with sadness because it’s time I should have spent enjoying my tiny baby. Eventually I deleted the tracking apps, stopped googling every damn thing and learned to trust my instinct.

The best bits…

Every time she does something new for the first time is just the best. I totally understand every conversation I had with parents in the past and why they used to mention things like ‘she/he just started pointing!’. It is amazing!

How do you make time for you?

This is not one of my strengths! But I’m getting much better at this especially the closer Lucy gets to turning one. At the moment I’m really into projects, I’m currently fixing up an old dollhouse I found at the Green Shed and a vintage desk I bought off marketplace.

What’s next for you and your family?

I’ve just returned to work part time and Lucy has started childcare, so at the moment I’m just hoping we get through the winter sickness and out the other side!