Alannah Riley

Tell us a bit about yourself?

My name is Alannah, and I am 32 years old. I was born on the Gold Coast, but grew up in the south east suburbs of Melbourne before moving here to Canberra at the age of 16. My parents separated when I was very young. Too young to remember my father. But he came back into my life around the age of 12. 

I have six siblings. Twin sisters from my mother’s side. Twins (boy/girl), a brother, and a sister from my father’s side. (Extra fun fact, my hubby has twin sisters too! They’re everywhere!)

I’m a teacher and photographer. And I love to spend any free moment reading or going for a walk with a podcast or audiobook in my ears. I recently started Pilates, like the rest of the world, and am attempting to get back into running. I do these things as time for myself. A way to reset myself. For my mental health 

What were you doing before babies/children?

Before children I had money, and time, and was wasting it complaining about wanting babies and children! Haha the irony. I wish I had something exciting to write. Truth is, I worked, we went away camping as much as we could, I enjoyed live music, I went to the gym, I spent time with friends, I shopped selfishly. But I honestly just always fixated on my desire to build myself a family. One I belonged in. I always felt quite on the outs with my own family. 

How did you come to be a mum?

My now husband and I were engaged, and I guess we just felt like it was time. But, after months of trying, we had no luck. And it was around the time we bought our house and were about to get married, so we decided to stop trying and wait until after the honeymoon. We had planned all of this adrenaline seeking activities in Queenstown. Well… two nights before our wedding I did a test. Purely because it was just sitting there. And the brightest positive line showed. We just had to laugh. Needless to say, I spent our honeymoon at the spa, rather than on the Nevis swing or flying foxes etc. 

What has your feeding journey been like?

With my first son, he had low blood sugar upon delivery so was fed formula to bring that back up. Which meant he wasn’t feeding from me. So, my milk took a little longer to come in. I found feeding really beautiful at first, but struggled with the fact that I didn’t have my body to myself. That, plus carpel tunnel in my wrists made me decide to wean at four months. 

My second son fed for eight months before he weaned himself. Looking back, I think my poor mental health dried me up. He was such an unsettled baby, I think he was trying to tell me. But I just wasn’t able to see. Hindsight is a great thing. 

This time around, I made it my mission to have a positive feeding experience. I took care of my mental health, I ensured I was eating well, drinking enough, making it a comfortable space for us to feed. And I’ve had the most amazing experience so far. We had a supply ‘scare’ a few months in. But, with support, I was able to rectify that within a few days. I absolutely love feeding this time around, and I’m so grateful I can end my feeding journey on a high. 

What has sleep been like in your house?

Baby 1 and 3 have been my best sleepers so far. Bub is about to hit four months. So check in with me in a few months. Haha. But my second born is still a pest. He takes hours to get to sleep, not unsettled, just a nuisance. He is unpredictable, and can wake through the night most nights. 

Both of my big boys are up before 6 every morning - loud as anything. Kills me. And as I have that condition most of us mothers have, sleep time procrastination, i tend to average about 5 hours sleep a night. Woops. 

The hardest bits…

There’s a lot of hard bits. But the worry is probably the overarching hard bit. Worrying that you’re doing enough. Worrying that they’re safe and happy and healthy. Worrying about whether you’re a good mum and wife. Worrying about how you’re going to juggle motherhood, working, finding time for yourself.

The behaviours and developmental stages have been hard too. I take these so personally and worry I’m not supporting them to the best of my ability. I worry about the judgement of others when my child acts like a child. Gosh, it can be a lot sometimes. 

The best bits…

These far outweigh the hard bits though, don’t they? Through every storm, we have these little people who think the world of us. Who are constantly learning and becoming their own little selves. They give the best hugs. They say the funniest things. They bring out your inner child. Every age and stage has beauty to it. Like, right now my youngest is smiling and talking to me. And every time - I just well up. My eldest expresses his love for me constantly and it always reminds me that I’m doing ok. My second son is my wild child and his charisma just cracks me up. It’s like, when I’m about to crack, he brings me back down again by being an absolute goof. They are my best bits. 

How do you make time for yourself?

It took me a long time to learn how to do this. With each child it has become easier to find time, weirdly enough. My husband knows that I need my me time to reset. So he fully supports that. On the days where it’s all too much, I chuck the baby in the pram, and the bigs on their bikes and we walk. Or, I chuck them in the car, and we drive! If I feel overwhelmed at home with the noise, podcast in my ears, and clean! And if all that seems like too much, we dance. The boys love our dance parties. 

What’s next for you and your family?

We are done having babies, for real this time. We are now focusing on saving for a bigger home. Focusing on school, work, sports and just mundane, beautiful life. I’m making it a personal goal to get us on a few extra holidays this year. My pregnancy was tough with my last babe, so we didn’t really leave Canberra. And I think I have permanent cabin fever now. I’m itching to get out. 

If you could talk to your pre baby/kid self, what advice would you give?

Oh, I have so much. But I guess my number one thing is, you’re about to get everything you ever wanted. Relax. It’s coming.