MAcarena ferreyra

Tell us a bit about yourself?

My name is Macarena, I'm originally from Argentina. I moved to Australia back in 2010.

What were you doing before babies?

Dancing, working as a barista and travelling as much as possible.

How did you come to be a mum?

I always wanted to be a mum. I used to play with friend's kids and cuddle babies at work sometimes so other mums could enjoy their coffee. When I met my partner he was like me in the sense he had always wanted to be a dad as well. We shared really similar values and we just knew we were right for each other to form a family. We decided to start trying around early November and after a few negative tests I started to question if it was a sign to wait. I had very little sex ed as a teenager but one thing was very clear IF YOU DON’T USE PROTECTION YOU WILL FALL PREGNANT. And there we were, no protection and nothing happening! It was a bit disappointing yet eye opening because I became aware of all the women who spend years trying with no luck. Then in January, after giving up in trying and making big life changing plans... I missed a period. I was like "what are the odds!?" (And yep, I was pregnant) All of the sudden I was scared shitless. "Do I want this baby?" "Is this the right thing?" "What about our adventure plans?". An abortion crossed my mind yet not long before I had accompanied a friend through the process and let me tell you it is not an easy decision to make, especially if you're on the fence. I went to see a GP to confirm the pregnancy with a blood test. She was so excited for me. I was like "don't be excited, i don't know if I wanna keep it!" She was great. Talked me through the options and by the end of my appointment I had decided to keep my pregnancy. A big note here on how important it is to have your partners support. My partner definitely wanted to have the baby but instead of ambushing me with his desires he held space for me and allowed me the time I needed to process and make a decision over my body. He did not guilt trip me or try convince me. He just hugged me and told me whatever I chose he would still love me the same. I think this is paramount. Because of this I felt in charge, empowered, supported and loved no matter what. Argentina had been struggling with the legalization of abortion, forcing women, even teenagers and victims of rape to carry through unwanted pregnancies so having access to unbiased medical support and education was something I felt extremely grateful for.

What has your feeding journey been like?

Amazing. I did not read much about feeding, only that it may take a couple of days for the supply to kick in and to allow enough time to try in a relaxed environment before thinking of other options. After he was born I just offered my breast and he stuck to it. Later on I learnt of the difficulties women experience breastfeeding, from physical to emotional. The stats say 96% of women start off exclusively breastfeeding yet by 3 months only 39% of women breastfeed and by 5 months it drops to 15%. Although I feel pretty lucky to have made it 8 months in I admit at one point we did try the bottle but he wouldn't take it. Now I'm kind of glad he didn't, at the time I really needed a break but now he's grown and eats solids I have way more time to myself and get the breaks I need.

What has sleep been like in your house?

Great. Except for a few days here and there. We co sleep and find that works best for us. It was probably the only thing we didn't discuss with my partner before our baby arrived. We both assumed he would sleep in a cot without a fuss like in the movies. Our first night back at home we had a reality check when bubba wouldn't go down on the bassinet so we all jumped in bed and that was that. Being able to sleep is a game changer.

The hardest bits...

When they are sick and there's not much you can do to ease their discomfort.

Being away from family and not knowing when they'd be able to meet him for the first time.

The best bits…

Oh everything else. I'm smitten by him. Seeing his development, his interests and expressive eyes. Wondering who he'll be and what he may like.

How do you make time for you?

In my last home visit a senior MACH nurse told me "you come first, not the baby. If you thrive, baby thrives" Those words stuck with me and I promised to practice them often. I take care of myself by dancing twice a week, I get massaged once a month, when daddy gets home he takes over so I can do whatever I need (sleep, shower, cuppa) and then on Sundays they go for a stroll to get mami a coffee while I do a bit of yoga/meditation on my own. It's all about expressing what you need I reckon, instead of waiting for your partner to read your mind. We chat often and we do our best to balance our lives so we are all fulfilled.

What’s next for you and your family?

Next step is submitting our partner visa so Jordan can gain residency and full working rights. It's an investment of over 11k and a fair bit of paperwork, but it will all be worth it! Even though we miss our homes we are extremely lucky we get to raise Camilo here.